This can’t be good.
Is it possible to look forward to something and dread it at the same time?
That something I’ve been having mixed feelings about is this coming weekend; and I get a slight headache every time I think about it.
Friday night is Shannon & Smalls’ Birthday Party cum Halloween majiggy
Saturday night is the Heineken Green Room event @ the brand new reopened Zouk Club
Both are major events I’ve had marked on my calendar lovingly, been itching to go for since a month ago, huhu 
BUT THEN.
I now also have Finance revision classes scheduled on that weekend,
Friday – Sunday, 9am – 7pm
OMG SUCKS TO BE ME RIGHT
So if I’m partying all night, and in class all morning noon evening,
where exactly does that leave sleep?
:+:+:
I’ve been sick all week last week, 
so I skipped out on the events and parties bit (SMD, sigh), especially after I thought I was well enough to have drinks at Cloth&Clef with the boys on Friday night, then my cough came back ten fold the next morning, 
I thought I had better sit still and recuperate properly this time, in anticipation of this coming Weekend Of Sheer Madness.
So with this rare opportunity that I find myself with very little to do, I start to think.
A lot.
Which could be a bad thing, but I also wonder if it’s really my good ol’ intuition screaming at me to wake the fuck up. She’s usually spot on about these things, though I can’t remember, I’ve shut her out a long time ago.
I find myself lighting a cigarette more often these days. I used to smoke only when I’m tipsy, partying and having a great time, but now? Hm. No cravings, just, frequent.
Insomnia. My bio clock is whack these days. Stress.
Fought with Daddy-O, which is rare, but when it happens it’s usually big. Stress.
Drama. Arguments. Or if we’re living in denial, we call them unpleasant conversations. Stress.
ACCA finals in a month. Stress.
I’m thinking of keeping a bottle in my room. My family doesn’t drink much, so there’s not a drop of alco in the entire house (unless you count my mom’s Chinese cooking wine).
But after some nights sipping on red wine and talking nonsense at random places, I found it very comforting. And it puts me to sleep easily.
But then again, that plan could backfire tremendously.
But there is a sense of comfort whenever I’m sitting in his growingly familiar room, being engulfed by that growingly familiar smell. Even when I’m busy hogging the computer while he snoozes, I breathe in and his smell still lingers. Ah, sanctuary.
Was at the bookstore to buy a myself fresh copy of The Little Prince, and I found another little treasure called The Velveteen Rabbit :)
If the title doesn’t sound the least bit familiar to you, then you are not a true fan of the FRIENDS tv sitcom
The story is short and simple; and as whimsical and truthful as my favourite chapter in The Little Prince :)
I’m drinking my second cup of coffee tonight while writing this post. While I think too much. God knows if I’ll be able to sleep tonight, but it doesn’t matter right now, coffee is comfort.
And when you’ve mentioned 3 addictive substances (coffee, cigarettes, alcohol) and associated them with comfort, you know this can’t be good.
:+:+:
The Australians are busy studying for finals around the corner, which is why I see alot of them online these days from all that procrastinating 
Eujin recently got busy procrastinating with PhotoFunia, made a whole album of his friends’ pictures and posted it up on Facebook.
This was mine.
SIGH.
Don’t get me wrong, I am still loving my new hair :) Reckon I’ll still play with this look for awhile.
But looking at this picture, and the rest of my older Facebook profile pictures, I couldn’t help but think.
Cheebye, my long hair was damn nice also right.
-_-
Currently listening to: Mogwai – Auto Rock
October 29th, 2008 at 2:20 pm
:) The Velveteen Rabbit is also magical
October 29th, 2008 at 2:40 pm
BOOO I also dread this weekend!! How la reach the party at 2am. T__T
October 29th, 2008 at 2:41 pm
woman! party hard but kick those vices! go dance out all your stress in the shower! ;)
October 29th, 2008 at 4:17 pm
whoah. i not stress until i read your post and now i also stress since exams are in a month and the more frequent smoking, drinking and coffee… omgoodness…more comforting to know i’m not the only one. wtf.
dont stress. see u at shannon’s and smalls’
and huiwen! u promise me to come. dont ffk k! i’ll be waiting. hoho
October 29th, 2008 at 5:39 pm
“But looking at this picture, and the rest of my older Facebook profile pictures, I couldn’t help but think.
Cheebye, my long hair was damn nice also right.
-_- “
No doubt about it…it goes better with the hair flip thing too.
October 29th, 2008 at 9:57 pm
woman… i think we both have new stories to share… lol!!! chat me up the next time ur on gmail or msn… ;)
October 30th, 2008 at 1:50 am
I don’t really know you but have been reading your blog for some time. I believe you are a well brought up person with values and stuffs. But please girl, do not smoke even in any circumstance. I dont believe a person has to resort to smoking to reduce stress or something. I have myself as a basis when I say this. Anyway, good luck!
October 30th, 2008 at 4:04 am
i agree with anonymous above. i can’t believe u actually resort to smoking. i personally think that smoking ruins a person’s image. especially a girl. it’s bad for your health too.
October 30th, 2008 at 5:26 am
stay off the cigarettes :)
i’m sure everything will work out!
October 30th, 2008 at 8:17 am
I have this REALLY old copy of the Velveteen Rabbit and I still love every bit of it! <3
October 31st, 2008 at 3:08 am
hey beautiful..been a long time since i left u a comment..agree wit some above dat u seem like a well brought up, extremely smart girl..so why would u do something as dumb(sorry to seem a bit harsh here) as smoking n drinking because ur stressed.. im sure u already know how those things can drag u down..
whatever ur looking for, be it juz some relief from stress, its not gonna be found at d bottom of a bottle or at d end of a stick.. so many other ways 2 comfort urself n relieve stress.. i remember u used 2 jog rite.. dats healthy, y not try dat again.. im sure u can find 30mins in ur busy day for it..
wah, i damn ‘cheong hei la’…hehe.. anyway do take care of urself ya..
October 31st, 2008 at 8:51 am
Thank you :)